Biblical Principles for Marriage - Part II

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This is the second sermon in a series of messages on marriage. It was given on Jan. 17, 2016 at Wayside Community Church.

Written Excerpts:

Genesis 1:27 (NKJV) So God created man in His own image; in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them.

Introduction: 

According to the Bible, “marriage is gender specific.”

There are at least three reasons why I believe the Bible teaches that marriage is gender specific.

I.    God purposely created two genders with specific distinctions.

Not only do we have the specific gender language used regarding the creation of humans (Gen. 1:27, which we’ll talk more about in just a moment), but we have Scriptures clearly indicating God that designed and required a distinction to be maintained between the genders. For example, in Deut. 25, there is a passage that condemns “cross-dressing” (women wearing men’s clothing and men wearing women’s). It is described as an abomination to God.

Even though people have different interpretations and ideas on how to apply that scripture to everyday life, almost all Bible scholars that I’ve read agree that the underlying principle of this passage is that God intends for there to be a clear distinction between the sexes. There are other passages which teach the same principle. But, our culture has been intentionally blurring the lines of distinction between the genders for decades.

I think it can be said that clear gender distinctions were the standard in our society until the “sexual revolution of the 1960’s.” There has been a constant push away from the “old worn out standards” and “stereotypes” and a cry for bold experimentation and acceptance of new “norms.” It seems like there are plenty of advocates which talk and act as if this is something “new” and “bold” and full of great possibilities, but little do they realize it is just a recycling of old perversions that permeated pagan cultures and societies for millennia. They’re the same practices that God condemned thousands of years ago and forbid His people to either condone or practice as they repeatedly sought to “be like their pagan neighbors.”

Twenty-four years ago, on January 20, 1992, Time Magazine ran a cover story by Christine Gorman about the differences between men and women. I’ve heard Rush Limbaugh refer to this article on the radio different times, but I looked it up online to see verify it.

The wording on the magazine cover read, “Why are men and women different? It isn't just upbringing. New studies show they are born that way.” Inside, the article starts out, “Scientists are discovering that gender differences have as much to do with the biology of the brain as with the way we are raised.”

I’ve heard Rush laugh at this article multiple times because the so-called experts think they are making this “new” discovery that men and women are different, when those who believe the Bible have known it all along! We were created that way!

II. Most, if not all, language used in context of marriage is gender specific.

Male vs Female – see Gen. 1:27.

This reference is used in direct connection with marriage even though the word marry/marriage isn’t mentioned. Without a doubt it is because this account clearly describes God creating a woman out of man and bringing her to him to be united with him, and because of the extended context that includes the end of chapter two… “they shall become one flesh.”

(TWOT) The word [Heb. word] zākār denotes the male [gender] of humans or animals. It is used in Gen. 1:27 in its basic sense where it occurs with "female" (neqēbâ) describing the creation of mankind. The word occurs frequently with neqēbâ denoting the sexes of humans (Gen. 5:2; Lev. 12:7, etc.) as well as of animals (Gen. 7:3, 9, 16, etc.). In short it is used for the male sex when sexual distinctions are in view.

This same author (TWOT) goes on to explain that the word is used whenever specifically “male” gender is required because of the context, i.e. circumcision, “knowing” a female intimately, and forbidding intimate relations with another male.

Man vs Woman – See Genesis 2:22-23 (NKJV) Then the rib which the LORD God had taken from man [ʾādām] He made into a woman [ʾishshâ], and He brought her to the man [ʾādām]. ²³ And Adam said: "This is now bone of my bones And flesh of my flesh; She shall be called Woman [ʾishshâ], Because she was taken out of Man [ʾîsh]."

The words used here define clear gender distinctions.

Husband vs Wife – See Eph. 5:22-33. These terms get more into an area of discussion that we will revisit next time, i.e. the principle of complementing each other in the marriage relationship.

The word used for “wife” is translated more often in the NT as “woman.” And, the word “husband” is more often translated “man.” This fact gives the clear impression that terms “husbands and wives” are gender specific.

There is no place in Scripture where the marriage relationship is described as being between people of the same gender. Some might try to argue that this only shows us what the biblical authors sanctioned or favored, but there were other views and practices that were prevalent in the world at the time.

Let me remind us that the Bible is not merely a collection of personal viewpoints by ordinary people who happened to express their opinions about the behaviors and standards of others around them. The biblical authors frequently claimed authority from God for what they wrote, and the clear message over and over was that the people of God were to be different from the prevailing culture.

There is plenty of evidence throughout both OT and NT that same sex relationships were condoned and practiced in the pagan cultures of the times, but they were condemned for the people of God, whether it included the Israelites in the OT or the Christians in the NT.

III. Biblical mandate for one-flesh union presupposes gender distinction.

I plan to expand on the concept of the union between the two people joined in marriage in a later sermon, but it has significance for this issue we’re discussing today as well.

Genesis 1:28 (NKJV) Then God blessed them, and God said to them, "Be fruitful and multiply; fill the earth and subdue it; have dominion over the fish of the sea, over the birds of the air, and over every living thing that moves on the earth."

The very first recorded command that God gave to the male and the female was to reproduce and fill the earth with their offspring.

Genesis 2:24 (NKJV) Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.

Matthew 19:4-6 (NKJV) And He answered and said to them, "Have you not read that He who made them at the beginning 'made them male and female,' ⁵ and said, 'For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh'? ⁶ So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate."

Jesus declares that the Creator (God, the Father) was the first one to say, “…the two shall become one flesh.” They were designed by the Creator to be physically united. The physical union was specifically designed by God for the male and the female.

Conclusion:

As we bring the message to a close I want to remind you that we’re doing this series of messages to honor marriage. I’m trying my best to avoid any attitude of condemnation, but rather to define and describe for you how God made us and for what purposes He created us.

People who believe the Bible as the standard for marriage are often characterized by the media and others as hate-mongers and bigots, etc. We do not hate people. The Bible tell us that God hates certain behaviors, so as His people we must not condone them either. But we love people and want the very best for them.

If we really accept the fact that God is our Creator, we need to understand the biblical truth that God loves us with a love beyond our comprehension, and all of the boundaries or laws God laid down for human beings to follow or live by, were all given to protect us and to guarantee our joy.

When I preached on the Ten Commandments in the past, I remember saying that so many people think that God gave us the commandments to restrict our freedom and to ruin our happiness. However the converse is actually the truth. He gave us principles and commandments to protect our freedom and our happiness. But, lest we forget, freedom and happiness aren’t the only values that are important to God. Our salvation is also included in this discussion. God created us to be in relationship with Him and ever since the beginning of time He has invited human beings to live in covenant with Him. The covenant includes a lot of things, but it ultimately involves our eternal salvation. And God has specific stipulations for anyone who hopes to be in a covenant relationship with Him. He created us, so He knows best how we are meant to function.

As I mentioned last week, once we abandon God’s design and plan for marriage, there is nothing stopping us from eventually condoning everything. Are we going to continue to honor marriage the way God designed it?

Let’s sing the closing song: Find Us Faithful