Nurture and Admonish

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This sermon was given on a Sunday in which Pastor Les and Kris' infant grandson was dedicated to the Lord. The message is based on Eph. 6:4 regarding the Apostle Paul's instructions to bring up our children in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.

Written Excerpts:

Ephesians 6:4 ^(NKJV) And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord. 

Introduction:

I felt the Lord prompted me to use the occasion of Samuel’s dedication today as an opportunity to speak a short time about the matter of nurturing and admonishing our children.

I’m sure I have made this statement before, but I want to stress to each one of us again today that our children (and grandchildren) are the only “earthly possessions” that we can take to heaven with us. We also recognize that when we bring children into this world, each child is an eternal soul who shall never cease to exist, but will live forever in one of two destinations: heaven or hell. No other responsibility in life is greater than the nurturing, training and teaching of our children to know the Lord and serve Him with all their hearts.

First, I want to share a few humorous examples of child conduct. Kids are so hilarious sometimes, especially if they belong to someone else!

High Five (Today's Best Illustrations) – On my son's fifth birthday, K.C. looked at his hand. Counting on his fingers, he said, "Mom, first I was one, then I was two, then three, yesterday I was four. Now I'm a whole handful." And he has been ever since! — Julia Chapman, Tennessee. Today's Christian Woman, "Small Talk."

Let's Eat! (Today's Best Illustrations) – One afternoon I was teaching our children about fire safety. I asked the children, "What's the first thing you should do when the smoke alarm goes off?" Five-year-old Benjamin immediately answered, "Take dinner out of the oven!" —Linda T., Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, "Life in Our House," Christian Parenting Today.

A few minutes ago I read several verses of Scripture from Paul’s letter to the Ephesians in which he addresses specific instructions to wives, husbands, children, and parents. I want to focus our attention for a brief time on Eph. 6:4 in which we read, “Do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.”

Much of the information and insights I offer on this Scripture were gleaned from the following commentaries: The Tyndale Commentary on Ephesians by Francis Foulkes; R.C.H. Lenski’s Commentary on Ephesians and the Expositor’s Bible Commentary by William Klein all have several pertinent comments on this text.

There are two main questions suggested by this passage:

1. How are children provoked to anger?

2. How are children nurtured and admonished?

1. How are children provoked to anger?

 “provoke” – verb, present tense, active voice, imperative mood; DO NOT keep on provoking…

(Lenski) - Unjust, improper parental treatment angers the child so that it cannot honor the parent. A long list of parental faults may be drawn up under Paul's summary which would include arbitrary, inconsistent, foolish, harsh, and cruel treatment.

One possible example is provided by the humorist, Erma Bombeck as related in the book, Today’s Best Illustrations.

The Dangers of Talking Too Much (Today's Best Illustrations) – The late humorist Erma Bombeck once reflected on what she had learned about parenting after her children left home:

"I talk too much. I had good material, but I used it indiscriminately. I used the same two-hour speech on filling their glass too full of milk that I used when they stayed out all night without coming home. The speech lost its effectiveness." — Leadership, Vol. 19, no. 2.

(Tyndale) – It is right for parents to demand obedience, but there must not be a ‘capricious exercise of authority’ (Robinson). Discipline is essential in the home; but not unnecessary rules and regulations and endless petty correction by which children are ‘discouraged’ (Col. 3:21). As New English Bible puts it, ‘You ... must not goad your children to resentment’. 

Anger can be provoked by a parent giving out punishment or “discipline” in anger himself/herself. Berating; name-calling; shaming; etc. These are all ways that parents can provoke anger and resentment or even bitterness in their children. Inconsistent rules and discipline can also exasperate a child to the point of anger. (Prohibiting conduct that was permissible yesterday or vice versa.) 

Adult behavior that continually embarrasses children. (e.g. Josh McDowell’s hatred for his father.)

2. How are children nurtured and admonished?

“bring up” – verb, present tense, active voice, imperative mood;  DO keep on bringing them up…

This word is translated “nourishes” in Eph. 5:29 where it speaks about a husband does not hate his own body but nourishes it.

(Tyndale) – The word was used originally of bodily nourishment, but came to be used for the nurture of the body, mind and soul. [There is a preposition (ek-) on the word that] suggests ‘development by care and pains’ (Moule, CB).

(A. Clarke) – Literally, “Nourish them in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.”

“nurture” – training, instruction, discipline, & chastening (EBC); same word translated 3 times in NT as chasten; also translated instruction. This word encompasses several aspects of training, including discipline and chastening. 

“admonition” – rebuking, counsel about avoiding or stopping an improper course of conduct (EBC).

Not only teaching and showing the proper course of conduct through discipline, but also rebuke and counsel when conduct has departed from the right path. For example, The priest Eli in the OT was rebuked by God for not providing any “nurture” or “admonition” to his sons who were grossly abusing their positions as priests in the Tabernacle of God.

 “of the Lord” – possibly a subjective genitive, i.e. the Lord is the content of the instruction. Or, could refer to the kind of nurture and admonition the Lord would give. (Lenski)

Parents must guard against the tendency to “teach” their kids about everything else in the world except how to know the Lord and obey His will.

In all of the discussion about how nurture and admonition is given, we cannot understate the importance of example. Parents must model the kind of behavior and conduct they wish to see in their children.

 (The Complete Book of Zingers) 

·     Children are creatures who disgrace you by showing in public the example you set for them at home.
·     Your children are not only heirs to your possessions—they are heirs to your values and character.

Conclusion:

Before we close this service today, we want to share one more special song of thanks to the Lord.

We not only thank Him for all our blessings in general, but we specifically thank Him for Samuel and for the privilege of all parents to lead our children to Christ and Christian living.

My Tribute by Andre Crouch